Mindful Poetic Stories Podcast

Celebrating The Voices of the Women Who Refused to Stay Silent
In this powerful International Women’s Day episode, I honour the women who risked everything to speak the truth. From survivors of abuse to whistleblowers who challenged powerful institutions, these stories remind us that courage, curiosity, and compassion can break even the deepest silence.
This episode explores resilience, justice, and the importance of listening to survivors, because when victims are silenced, evil and injustice thrives.
Our curiosity is not corruption, it is our consciousness.
 
Women and Stories Featured in This Episode
Virginia Giuffre; Author of Nobody’s Girl, Virginia’s story is one of remarkable courage and compassion after surviving unimaginable abuse. Her willingness to speak publicly helped expose powerful systems of exploitation.
Philomena Lee; Philomena’s heartbreaking experience in Ireland’s Magdalene Laundry system highlights the injustice faced by unmarried mothers whose babies were taken from them.
Gisèle Pelicot; quote “Shame has to change sides”. She chose to waive her right to anonymity in the trial of her ex-husband and the 50 men convicted of her sexual assault.
Helen Evans; A former safeguarding officer who exposed systemic sexual abuse within humanitarian aid organizations.
Rose McGowan; One of the first women to publicly accuse Harvey Weinstein of sexual assault, helping ignite the global #MeToo movement.
Sara Rowbotham; A social worker who fought for justice for victims despite resistance from authorities.
Joanne Hayes; Wrongly accused in 1980’s in one of Ireland’s most infamous miscarriages of justice before receiving a public apology decades later.
Catherine Corless; Her research uncovered the names of hundreds of children who died in the mother and baby home in Tuam, Ireland, forcing a national reckoning.
Lisa Phillips; An Epstein survivor speaking publicly about accountability and the power of survivors reclaiming their voices.
 
Documentaries, Books & Films Recommended
Nobody’s Girl Book by Virginia Guiffre A survivor’s powerful memoir
Philomena (2013) Movie, The true story of the search for her son
Pray for Us Sinners Documentary by Sinead O’Shea on Ireland’s mother and baby homes
Stolen Documentary – The story behind the discovery of children buried in unmarked graves
When We Speak a 2022 Documentary about women who risk everything to tell the truth
A Hymn To Life;  Book by Gisèle Pelicot
Ash + Salt; From Survival to Empowerment After Sexual Assault- Book by Sarah Grace
Website; Celebrating Women Whistleblowers Who have Changed the World; https://www.whistleblowers.org/members_categories/women-whistleblowers/
 
Key Themes
Speaking truth to power
Sexual abuse survivors and whistleblowers
The legacy of Ireland’s Magdalene Laundries and Mother and Baby Homes
Institutional silence and accountability
Why victims often remain silent
The power of curiosity, awareness, and collective courage
 
Key Quote from the Episode
“A victim’s silence is not weakness, it is emotional survival.”
 
Final Reflection
The story of Pandora’s Box reminds us that when truth is revealed, pain may surface, but hope remains.
Every movement for justice begins when ordinary people refuse to stay silent.
 
Einstein said, "Everything is energy and that’s all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy. This is physics.” –
 
This is a call out to match your energy to what you want to feed in this world.  
What you want to grow.
What you want to protect.
 
Rise up, own your voice, and let hope endure
This episode is dedicated to the women who used their voices so others could find theirs.
 
Listen & Follow
If this episode resonated with you, follow the podcast and share it with someone who believes in truth, courage, and justice.

Reflections; on a Self Love Journey
The Power of the Pause on A Year of Self-Welcoming, Self-Love & Inner Wisdom
 
Episode 52 marks one full year of podcasting, and instead of rushing ahead, this episode was crafted from a mindful pause. A reflection on fear, self-sabotage, emotional intelligence, neuroscience, self-love, and the inner Sage that guides us home to ourselves.
This episode weaves poetry, personal storytelling, philosophy, neuroscience, coaching insights, and poetic reflection to explore how our inner voices shape our lives, and how learning self-compassion, emotional regulation, and mindful self-care builds the strongest foundation of all: self-preservation through self-love.
This is not a journey of “self-help,” but a self-welcoming journey, toward peace, resilience, meaning, and living in alignment with who you truly are.
 
Quotes from the Episode
“No one teaches us how to talk to ourselves — and yet it shapes our entire life.”
“Knowledge is only powerful when it’s applied.”
“Knowing is 20%. Action is 80%.”
“Labelling is disabling.”
“The secret to change is to focus all your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new.” Socrates
“Peace is priceless.”
“No one drives me crazy unless I hand them my keys.”
“Self-compassion softens the harsh edges inside you.”
“Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.”
 
Key Themes Explored
The power of the pause and reflection
Self-sabotaging inner voices (Victim, Pleaser, Stickler, Avoider)
Emotional intelligence; EQ vs IQ
Fear as a system of control vs inner awareness as liberation
Ancient wisdom (Buddha, Confucius, Lao Tzu, Socrates)
Neuroscience, neuroplasticity, and nervous system balance
Fight-or-flight vs rest-and-digest
Gut health, hormones, and emotional wellbeing
Mirror work and healing unfelt pain
Writing, creativity, and finding meaning
Living in alignment with values
Self-love as self-preservation
 
Key Takeaways
Self-love is not indulgence, it is self-preservation
Fear keeps us stuck; awareness sets us free
Emotional intelligence is foundational to a fulfilling life
Our brains are malleable, what’s learned can be relearned
Healing happens through practice, not just knowledge
Peace comes from within, not from controlling circumstances
Self-compassion creates the safety needed for growth
When we stop fighting ourselves, transformation begins
Meaning and purpose make life bearable, and beautiful
 
Your time to Reflect & Journal
What if the voice sabotaging you isn’t the truth, but an outdated coping mechanism?
What happens when you stop fighting yourself and start listening to your inner Sage?
How would your life change if you met yourself with unconditional love instead of judgment?
 
Final Note
This episode is a celebration, of consistency, courage, healing, and a year of showing up. A huge thank you to everyone who has been involved, for their support and encouaragement, and a huge thank you to you my listeners for tuning in and turning up for you.
With a reminder that you matter, that your inner wisdom is real, and that choosing self-love is a revolutionary act in a fear-driven world.
If you’d like to explore positive intelligence coaching and mental fitness, you’re invited to reach out to me via email
 
As always, take care of you.
 
You matter. Today, tomorrow, and every day.
 
Email me hello@pacoaching.co.uk to find out more about positive intelligence coaching, mental fitness and the journey of self love, and to book a free no obligation discovery call
 

Your Home Song; Coming home to the unshakeable foundation of self-love
This episode is about you.
Your journey of coming home to yourself.
At the very heart of this podcast is the invitation to build a solid, unshakeable foundation of self-love, from the core of who you are.
 
Your Sage self. Your authentic essence.
 
In this deeply personal and reflective episode, Patricia shares her own journey from feeling unlovable, not good enough, and disconnected from herself to discovering the power of self-care, self-welcoming, and unconditional self-love. Through stories from childhood, school, comparison, shame, and healing, she explores how our private logic, early experiences, and internal saboteurs shape the way we see ourselves, and how we can rewrite those stories and heal.
 
This is an episode about mental fitness, emotional intelligence, Positive Intelligence coaching, and learning how to live from a place of inner peace, authenticity, and self-trust.
Because when we come home to ourselves, we can stop merely surviving, and start living, thriving, and shining.
 
Quotes from this Episode;
“The journey home to yourself with unconditional self-love is the strongest, most stable foundation you can live and grow from.”
“Comparison is the thief of contentment, and for years, I didn’t know what was stealing mine.”
“When I didn’t love myself, I was miserable. When I found self-love, I found the home within me, and I feel alive.”
“Our true responsibility in this life is to be true to ourselves and love the miracle that we are.”
“The distress is not the event, it’s what happens inside us as a result of the event. And that is always personal.”
“True lovability begins when you choose to welcome yourself home.”
 
Key Concepts Explained
Private Logic (Alfred Adler)
Our private logic is the unconscious belief system we form most of the time in childhood based on our experiences, environment, perceptions and interpretations. It shapes how we see ourselves, others, and the world, and can either empower us or limit us.
 
Saboteur vs Sage (Positive Intelligence)
Saboteurs: Fear-based survival patterns rooted in shame, comparison, and self-criticism
Sage: The wise, loving inner voice that helps us thrive through curiosity, empathy, creativity, and purpose
 
Mental fitness work helps weaken saboteurs and strengthen the Sage, creating emotional resilience and wellbeing.
 
References Mentioned
Alfred Adler – Individual Psychology & the concept of Private Logic
Positive Intelligence® – Mental Fitness framework (Saboteur vs Sage)
Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ (1995)
Poem; Henry Van Dyke, A Home Song
Journal; I’m Lovable – discovered at Waterstones, Piccadilly (2017)
 
Poetic Inspiration
Henry Van Dyke – A Home Song
“Every house where love abides,
And friendship is a guest,
Is surely home, and home-sweet-home:
For there the heart can rest.”
 
Re-imagined for this episode:
The world needs your unique authentic light.
From the beautiful home within you.
Find it, claim it, and let it shine.
 
Key Takeaways
You are one of a kind; biologically, emotionally, neurologically
Self-love is not selfish; it is the foundation of authentic living
Childhood experiences shape beliefs, but they do not define your future
Comparison erodes self-worth; authenticity restores it
Emotional intelligence and mental fitness are essential life skills
Healing begins when we tell our stories with compassion
Your true home is within your body and being
When you live from your Sage, you serve yourself, and others more fully
 
Recommendations
Begin noticing your inner self sabotaging negative voices, without judgment
Practice self-welcoming instead of self-criticism
Book a discovery call with Patricia to explore Positive Intelligence mental fitness practices
Develop emotional intelligence skills: self-awareness, self-regulation, empathy
Write your own story; your words matter
Protect your energy, peace, and uniqueness
Choose yourself, again and again
 
Final Reflection
Home is not just a place.
Home is not something we earn.
Home is where the heart rests, and the soul is at peace.
And your truest home lives within you.
 
Come home to the one of a kind beautiful creation that is you.
 
Emails hello@pacoaching.co.uk
Website www.pacoaching.co.uk
 
 
 

Building Habits, Building You
In this episode, Patricia dives into the powerful connection between self-care, identity, and habit formation. You’ll learn why habits, not resolutions, shape your future, how to become the “anthropologist” of your own life, and how tiny, consistent actions create long-term transformation. With insights from coaching, behavioural science, and personal stories, this episode guides you toward building habits that support a more intentional, compassionate, and fulfilling life.
 
Key Takeaways
Habits shape your reality; Research suggests nearly half of our daily actions are habitual, often unconscious, and can steer us toward growth or self-sabotage.
Interference holds us back; Coaching helps uncover the internal patterns (beliefs, fears, conditioning) that block your potential.
Start small; Micro-habits bypass resistance and help your brain form new neural pathways with ease.
Identity matters; As James Clear notes, habits stick when anchored to who you want to become, not just what you want to achieve.
The RAS is always listening; Your brain filters information for whatever you focus on, so feed your intentions, not your fears.
Habit formation takes time; The “21-day rule” is a myth. Research shows habits can take anywhere from 18 to 254 days to become automatic.
Consistency over perfection; Missing a day doesn’t break a habit, but quitting on yourself does.
Track, celebrate, repeat; Small wins activate dopamine and reinforce your identity as someone who follows through.
Gentleness is non-negotiable; Long-term sustainable change is built on self-love, patience, and awareness, not pressure.
 
Quote;
“People do not decide their futures, they decide their habits — and their habits decide their futures.” — F.M. Alexander
 
Referenced Research
Habit Formation Research
Phillippa Lally et al. (2009), University College London; Study finding an average of 66 days to reach habit automaticity (range 18–254 days).
 
Tiny Habits / Behaviour Design
BJ Fogg, Stanford University — Behaviour Model and the science behind tiny habits.
 
Identity-Based Habits
James Clear — Book, Atomic Habits
 
Coaching Foundations
Timothy Gallwey — “Performance - Interference = Potential – Interference”
Positive Intelligence - https://www.positiveintelligence.com/
 
Final Message
This year, choose habits that honour who you are becoming. Start small, stay curious, celebrate every win, and build a foundation of self-love that can support meaningful, lasting change.
You matter, today, this year, next year and every year.
 
Email me at hello@pacoaching.co.uk
Website www.pacoaching.co.uk
 
 

Reclaiming Your Power: Mental Fitness, Self-Love & the Sage Within
 
Episode Release: Christmas Eve Special
 
Episode Summary
In this heartfelt Christmas Eve episode, Patricia is closing out the year by revisiting the core themes that have shaped our journey together: emotional resilience, self-love, and the transformative power of mental fitness. You’ll hear why many of us stay stuck in self-sabotage, how our “Saboteur” autopilot loops keep us in survival mode, and, most importantly, how reconnecting with your inner Sage is the key to lasting positive change.
 
This episode also includes an exciting announcement: one listener will win a Positive Intelligence Coaching Programme with me in the New Year!
 
If you’ve been feeling disconnected, battling self-doubt, or longing to lead a more intentional, empowered life… this is the episode that ties it all together.
 
Key Takeaways
Self-Love Is a Revolutionary Act
Drawing on the insights of Tina Lifford and Abiola Abrams, we explore why knowing and accepting yourself is the foundation of emotional resilience, empowerment, and genuine transformation.
 
Mental Fitness = Thriving, Not Just Surviving
Mental fitness helps you shift from the self-neglect of Saboteur mode to the self-care and clarity of Sage mode. It allows you to recognise your internal programs, outdated beliefs, and survival-driven thought loops that hold you back.
 
The Autopilot Trap & Why Change Fails
Many attempts at positive change fail because we live on autopilot, constantly pulled back by ingrained habits, limiting assumptions, and emotional survival patterns formed long ago.
 
Performance = Potential – Interference
Based on Timothy Gallwey’s pioneering coaching work, we examine how your internal “interference patterns” drain your potential, and how Positive Intelligence coaching helps you dismantle them.
 
Your Inner Sage Is Always There
Your intuitive wisdom, the Sage, is quiet but powerful. Strengthening it requires daily mental fitness practice, awareness, and the ability to pause, choose, and respond intentionally.
 
You Can’t Thrive and Survive at the Same Time
Survival mode keeps you anxious, dysregulated, and limited. Sage mode opens the door to creativity, wellbeing, deeper relationships, and real happiness.
 
Happiness Leads to Success (Not the Other Way Around)
Positive psychology confirms that cultivating happiness first boosts motivation, resilience, productivity, and life satisfaction.
 
Emotional Intelligence Matters More Than IQ
Inspired by Daniel Goleman’s groundbreaking work, we discuss why emotional intelligence, not cognitive intelligence, matters more and is what truly shapes our success, fulfilment, happiness and meaningful relationships.
 
Transformation Begins With Your Relationship With Yourself
To step into the future you desire, you must:
Understand your internal programs
Identify both strengths and sabotaging behaviours
Quiet the inner critic
Strengthen your intuitive Sage wisdom
These are the foundations of personal power and mental fitness.
 
Episode Recommendations
Practice the Power of the Pause
As Viktor Frankl said: “Between stimulus and response, there is a space.”
Use this space to reconnect with your Sage, regulate your emotions, and choose consciously instead of reacting from fear.
 
Begin a Simple Daily Mental Fitness Practice
Small, consistent exercises that engage your Sage build new neural pathways and strengthen your emotional resilience. Engage your senses regularly and you will start to reconnect with your Sage.
 
Start an Internal Dialogue Audit
Pay attention to your inner voices. Are they driven by fear, doubt, or outdated survival patterns, or by intuition, wisdom, and compassion?
 
Focus on Intentional Living
Shift from autopilot to awareness. Choose habits that support your future self, not your old protective patterns.
 
Own Your Story
Let go of self-doubt and reclaim your inner authority. Your personal power lies not in perfection, but in self-acceptance and alignment.
 
Listener Giveaway (Christmas Eve Special!)
To celebrate the year and this journey of emotional growth, I’m gifting one listener a Positive Intelligence Coaching Programme in the New Year.
Listen to the episode for details on how to enter!
 
Final Words
Your inner Sage is never lost, it’s waiting to be heard. When you reconnect with it, you reclaim your worth, your voice, and your power. You become the author of your life.
 
Know yourself. Accept yourself. Love yourself.
Because when you do, you become invincible.
 
Email me at hello@pacoaching.co.uk
website www.pacoaching.co.uk
 

The Christmas Gift of Presence: Digital Detox, Family Connection & The Power of Gratitude
 
Episode Summary
In this heartfelt Christmas episode, Patricia shares two powerful personal stories from last year’s holiday season, one planned, one unplanned, that enhance her wellbeing over the festive holidays. From an intuitive two-week digital detox with her mum, to a family “Gratitude Attitude Jar,” she explores how unplugging, reconnecting, and receiving gratitude can profoundly impact mental health, emotional resilience, and joy.
 
Listeners will hear practical guidance for digital fasting, family connection, emotional awareness, and creative ways to build meaningful traditions that nurture peace, presence, and genuine human connection.
 
Key Takeaways
Unplanned pauses can become the greatest gifts. A spontaneous digital break led to deeper connection, peace, and presence.
Deadlines matter, but not more than people. What feels urgent often isn’t; what’s irreplaceable often is.
Technology is designed to keep our attention. Taking it back requires awareness, limits, and compassion.
Digital detoxing reduces stress and boosts creativity. Stepping back created space for workshops, games, and meaningful conversations.
Gratitude is most powerful when it’s received, not just expressed. Research shows witnessing gratitude strengthens emotional and physical wellbeing.
Small, consistent habits make digital boundaries easier. Start with 30 minutes, one room, or removing one app.
Family rituals deepen connection. A gratitude jar, creativity prompts, or shared offline time can become cherished traditions.
 
Memorable Quotes
“Sometimes the gift of switching off comes without being planned.”
“Is a problem a problem if you don’t think it’s a problem?”
“My mum won’t be here forever. I won’t be here forever. Deadlines can wait, making memories cannot.”
“The digital world promised connection, but we are becoming more disconnected in real life.”
“Start small. Half an hour. One hour. Build up. Reclaim your attention.”
“Gratitude isn’t only about giving thanks, its potent power is in receiving it.”
“The genuine exchange of gratitude costs nothing, but gives everything.”
“Presence is the best Christmas gift any family can share.”
 
Episode Highlights
Patricia’s intuitive choice to take a two-week tech-free Christmas with her mum
Letting go of deadlines and perfectionism
The reality of digital overwhelm and “nomophobia”
Creative family connection rituals during the holidays
Why tech leaders like Steve Jobs limited their own children’s device use
Get creative and start your own digital fast or digital detox
A deep dive into the “December Gratitude Attitude bottled”
Research on gratitude, emotional wellbeing, and the power of receiving thanks
Practical ways to nurture your attention, focus, and mental health
A Christmas challenge to reclaim presence, joy, and connection
 
Tips & Recommendations Mentioned
Digital Detox Ideas
Create a family digital lockbox
Synchronise “phone-off” times together
Start with 30 to 60 minutes of tech-free time
Limit use of one specific app
Choose tech-free rooms (especially the bedroom)
Make your phone not the first/last thing of the day
Remove social media apps temporarily
Take nature walks, visit friends, or plan creative games
 
Gratitude Practices
Make a Gratitude Attitude Jar for the holiday season
Read gratitude notes aloud as a family
Create a Christmas Gratitude Journal
o Morning: “10 things I’m grateful for”
o Evening: “3 people who made my day happier”
o Bedtime: “The best part of my day was…”
 
Research & Resources
Huberman Lab Podcast: The Science of Gratitude
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KVjfFN89qvQ
 
Message to Listeners
A gentle reminder to choose presence over pressure. Your wellbeing matters 365 days a year, and the greatest gifts of the season are compassion, togetherness, love, and real-life connection.
 
To find out more about mental fitness or book a discovery call email hello@pacoaching.co.uk
 

Rethinking Christmas; Stress, Mindset & Meaning
A reflective, poetic look at the emotional weight of Christmas, and practical ways to bring calm, creativity, and connection back into the holidays.
 
In this heartfelt Christmas-themed episode, Patricia shares the story that inspired a powerful reframing of the season: a 2021 conversation with someone who “hated Christmas”, perhaps not so much for its meaning, but for its pressure.
That conversation sparked a deeper exploration into stress, expectation, emotional reactivity, and how mental fitness can transform the holiday experience.
 
You’ll hear personal stories of family, loss, boundaries, overwhelm, creative traditions, and ultimately, how mindset shifts lead to a more peaceful, intentional holiday.
 
Key Takeaways:
Most people don’t hate Christmas, they hate the stress, so normalised, round it.
Consumerism, pressure, overspending, overconsumption, and emotional reactivity create anxiety that becomes normalised.
Emotional intelligence changes everything.
Building inner calm allows you to experience peace even during chaos, instead of running from stress.
Expectations are the root of holiday burnout.
Letting go of the “perfect Christmas” allows joy to emerge naturally.
What you feed grows.
Thoughts, beliefs, actions, they all expand where attention goes. Pause to ask:
“Is this feeding what I want more of… or less of?”
Power pauses are essential.
Regular, mindful check-ins help you shift from reactivity to intentional response.
Boundaries matter every day of the year.
Healthy limits protect wellbeing, energy, and connection, especially during emotionally charged seasons.
Creativity & connection can transform Christmas.
Games, question boxes, writing challenges, outdoor adventures, and family “spotlight days” build meaningful memories without spending money.
If you’re alone this Christmas, it can still be mindful and meaningful.
Community events, volunteering, support lines, or simple rituals can create connection.
 
Practical Recommendations:
Holiday Mental Fitness Practices
The Power Pause: Ask yourself what you’re feeding right now, and adjust.
Intentional breathing: Try box breathing (4-4-4).
Emergency Relaxation Plan: Time in nature, a brisk walk, music, or mindful movement to reset your nervous system.
Mindful Eating: Savour each bite , taste, texture, temperature.
 
Creative, Connection-Building Traditions
Christmas Question Box: Everyone creates 3 questions to put into the box, and then everyone picks one at random to answer.
Family Member of the Day: Celebrate one person intentionally.
Nature Photo Stories: Each person takes one outdoor photo, then shares the story behind it.
Family Writing Challenge: Create poems, limericks, haikus or stories from a shared prompt.
Play, laugh, make fun memories: Encourage imagination, curiosity, mistakes, and silliness.
 
For anyone spending Christmas alone
Check local churches/community centres for events.
Visit Action to End Loneliness. https://www.campaigntoendloneliness.org/
Use free helplines such as Samaritans (116 123) or Shout (text SHOUT to 85258).
Consider volunteering; its grounding, connecting, and meaningful.
 
Memorable Quotes from the Episode
“Do you hate Christmas, or do you hate the hype, stress, and pressure we’ve normalised?”
“What you feed grows! That includes our thoughts, your beliefs, your actions.”
“I believed Christmas was uncontrollable stress… but now I can find peace even in chaos.”
“Take ownership of you. Build emotional intelligence within yourself first.”
“Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change.” Wayne Dyer
“Negative emotions aren’t the problem — staying in them is.”
“Your health matters 365 days a year.”
“You can’t use up creativity, the more you use, the more you have.” Maya Angelou
“Creativity is inventing, experimenting, making mistakes, and having fun.” Mary Lou Cook
“You matter 365 days of the year, look after you.”
Book a discover call with Patricia by emailing hello@pacocahing.co.uk
 
 

Introduction
In this heartfelt December episode, Patricia shares stories of Christmases past, present, and future, and how the festive season, while full of joy, can also bring exhaustion, overwhelm, perfectionism, people-pleasing, and emotional strain.
Patricia shares a poetic reflection on her former “autopilot Christmases,” the impact of mental fitness on transforming the holiday experience, and practical tools to help you reclaim peace, presence, and personal power this festive season. How you can not only survive Christmas but thrive through it.
 
Whether you celebrate Christmas or any other big holiday, this episode offers guidance to help you thrive, not merely survive.
 
Key Takeaways
Christmas stress is often habit-driven. Much of the overwhelm comes from autopilot patterns: needing to control, please, or perfect everything.
The Power of the Pause can transform your emotional experience, helping you choose peace, compassion, and presence rather than chaos and reactivity.
A Personal Christmas Mission Statement brings clarity and intention to the season, helping you stay aligned with what truly matters.
Emotional wellbeing > perfection. People remember connection, humour, and togetherness, not flawless dinners or pristine décor.
Boundaries are essential. Saying yes to everything often means saying no to yourself.
Support children with empathy. Christmas consumerism can heighten expectations; teaching emotional awareness and kindness helps them navigate disappointment.
Joy is created, not bought. Connection, generosity, and shared traditions hold much deeper value than gifts.
 
Notable Quotes
“Between every stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response.” – Viktor Frankl
“No one can drive you crazy unless you give them the keys.”
“This Christmas, begin with the end in mind and choose what truly matters to you.”
“Your wellbeing is priceless, kindness and connection last longer than perfection.”
“The power is not in the choice itself, but in consciously choosing.”
 
Practical Recommendations
Write Your Personal Christmas Mission Statement
Reflect on:
Past Christmases—your memories, values, and lessons
The present—your intentions and what you want to cultivate
The future—how you want to feel in early January
Turn your reflections into a short, positive, written daily reminder such as:
“This Christmas, I choose………… calm, connection, and presence.”
 
Practice the Power of the Pause
Use mindful pauses to:
Regulate your emotions
Reduce reactivity
Redirect energy from chaos toward love, compassion, clarity, and peace
 
Let Go of Autopilot “Needs”
Need to control:
Prioritise kindness over being right; release tension for the greater good.
Need to be perfect:
Embrace imperfection. Chaos often becomes the story everyone laughs about years later.
Need to please:
Choose your “yes” and “no” consciously. Set boundaries. Ask for help. Delegate.
 
Support Children Emotionally
Validate their feelings, especially around disappointment or comparison
Use creative outlets to help them express emotions
Teach the joy of giving with family kindness lists, handmade gifts, or toy donations
 
Remember What Christmas Is Really About
Connection.
Joy.
Presence.
Compassion.
Shared moments—not perfect gifts or flawless planning.
 
Food you can buy more of! Gifts you can buy more of!
 
But time is something you can’t buy!
 
contact me via my website www.pacoaching.co.uk
or email me hello@pacoaching.co.uk
 

In this episode, Patricia explores the surprising science, psychology, and emotional wisdom behind tears. Why we cry and why it matters. From childhood beliefs about “crying alone,” to the therapeutic power of being seen, to the extraordinary microscopic landscapes of Rose-Lynn Fisher’s Topography of Tears, this conversation reveals why tears are far more than a sign of sadness, they’re a biological release, an emotional reset, and a universal human connector.
 
Introduction
We often rush to stop our own tears, and the tears of others. Yet emotional tears are uniquely human and play a crucial role in healing, connection, and self-understanding. Today’s episode explores the biology of crying, why we’re uncomfortable with emotions, how coaching spaces can invite healthy release, and the unexpected beauty contained within a single tear drop.
 
Key Takeaways
Emotional tears are biologically healing, releasing stress hormones and boosting oxytocin and endorphins.
We often shut down tears due to discomfort, not compassion, yet supportive presence can make crying therapeutic.
Tears can appear in coaching spaces when clients finally feel safe, seen, and heard.
Microscopic tear patterns are unique, revealing emotional “landscapes” as shown in Rose-Lynn Fisher’s Topography of Tears.
Crying is universal but deeply personal, influenced by culture, context, and human connection.
Not all crying is cathartic, its healing depends on how others respond.
Tears mark emotional turning points, allowing acceptance, release, and renewal.
There is nothing to fear about tears, they connect us to ourselves and to one another.
 
Notable Quotes
“We have nothing to fear from tears.”
“Comforted tears heal, ignored tears may deepen pain.”
“Tears are landscapes of emotion, tiny maps of the human soul.”
“We cannot control the ocean, but we can learn to surf.”
“Tears mark turning points, moments of acceptance, release, and renewal.”
“If you need to cry, cry unapologetically.”
“A safe space can turn tears into empowerment.”
 
Recommended Books
The Topography of Tears – Rose-Lynn Fisher
A stunning visual exploration of human emotion through microscopic tear photography.
The Crying Book – Heather Christle
A poetic, literary, and deeply moving examination of why humans cry.
Why Humans Cry – Ad Vingerhoets
A scientific look at crying, catharsis, and emotional expression.
In Praise of Therapeutic Crying – Jeffrey Von Glahn (article)
A compassionate exploration of crying as a healing tool
 
Contact me via my website www.pacoaching.co.uk
or email hello@pacoaching.co.uk
 

Listening
The Art of Listening, Where Love Begins
 
Episode Summary
In this reflective and heartfelt episode, Patricia explores the profound power of listening to others, to life, and most importantly, to ourselves. Drawing from personal stories, coaching experiences, and emotional lessons learned, this episode invites you to slow down, embrace silence, and reconnect with your inner Sage wisdom. You’ll learn why listening is one of the most transformational acts of love, how active listening nurtures deeper relationships, and how mental can help us cultivate self-listening and help us build emotional resilience, and meaningful human connection.
 
Key Takeaways
Listening is the foundation of love and human connection.
To feel listened to is to feel seen, valued, and loved. Listening builds trust, belonging, and emotional safety, things every human deeply needs.
Silence is not emptiness, it's powerful.
Silence helps nourish wisdom, create space for deeper reflection, and reveal truths often missed in noise and distraction.
Active listening transforms relationships.
Listening without interruption, judgment, fixing, or assuming allows others to process their own thoughts and uncover their own answers; “the brain that contains the problem also contains the solution.”
Listening to yourself is an act of self-love.
Your mind, body, intuition, and emotions are constantly communicating with you. When disconnected or distracted, you lose access to your inner wisdom.
Our digital, fast-paced world weakens our listening muscles.
Overconsumption and constant distraction make it easy to lose touch with our inner voice—and with each other.
Advice is often less helpful than curiosity.
Well-intentioned advice can interrupt someone’s thought process. Curious questions create space for clarity and empowerment.
Mental fitness reduces self-sabotage and strengthens your inner Sage.
By diminishing self-neglect and the self sabotaging Saboteur voice, you create space for intuitive, compassionate, aligned decision-making.
We must relearn deep listening in our families.
Partners, children, and friends thrive when we give them the gift of undivided attention, especially during emotional moments.
Self-listening is needed before we can listen to others well.
You cannot offer presence, compassion, or understanding if you don’t practice them with yourself first.
Listening is love in action.
A five-minute conversation where someone feels truly listened to is more nourishing than hours of distracted half-presence.
 
Notable Quotes
“Silence is the sleep that nourishes wisdom.” Francis Bacon
“Listening is an art form.” Nancy Kline
“Love is listening, and listening is loving.” Patricia Ahern
“Silence is not empty, it’s full of answers.”
“The brain that contains the problem also contains the solution.” Nancy Kline
“Listening is where love begins.” Patricia Ahern
“Every view is the wrong view if held as the only view.”
“Your brain is always eavesdropping on your mind.”
“You are a miracle, and self-love is your most powerful asset.” Patricia Ahern
 
Your Call to Action This Week
Make space to listen to others
Offer someone you love the gift of your full, uninterrupted presence.
No fixing. No advising. Just listening.
Make space to listen to yourself
Ask yourself with compassion:
What do I think? What do I feel? What do I believe right now?
Create micro moments of silence
Let silence nourish your inner wisdom.
Strengthen self-love through self-listening
Place a hand on your heart and affirm your worth.
Reconnect with your childhood self.
Stop saying yes when your heart says no.
Make meaningful time for yourself.
 
Final Reflection
Listening heals. Listening connects. Listening helps us belong.
And when we learn to listen deeply to others and to ourselves, we awaken our inner Sage and live with greater clarity, purpose, and compassion.
Thank you for listening with an open heart, open mind, and open ears.
 
Connect through my website www.pacoaching.co.uk
or email at hello@pacoaching.co.uk